“Better a dry crust eaten in peace than a house filled with feasting—and conflict.” Proverbs 17:1 NLT
Memories of my own family meals growing up were filled with tension of one sort or the other. Truth is, there were probably many, many meals that weren’t chaotic, Dad wasn’t drunk and table was filled with laughter. However, I can’t remember a single one of those meals. I only remember the traumatic ones. Honestly, there are a lot of holes in my memories, black boxes of time, filed with things my body chose to store, but my mind put up barriers. I’m told this is just how childhood works.
As Robin and I began are own parenting journey, we were determined to make meals happy memories. Hopefully when our adult children look back, they’ll see and feel peace and lots of smiles. Sure there were the normal standoffs about eating certain foods like tuna, homemade mac-n-cheese and quiche with carrots and broccoli. But overall, there were many meals shared around the table or out at quick serve restaurants, surrounded by church family – in fun! We were able to eat crust, as in pizza crust, tacos, hot dogs and hamburgers in peace. They were pleasant feasts to us. Tonight, in Tahoe, we’ll celebrate a custom we created years ago – pizza on the dock. We changed it to a outdoor picnic when our littles came along. I am thankful for our family meals, where we all come together. There’s been almost no drama, trauma or conflict in our gatherings. If you get a chance to make peace happen at mealtimes, changing the habits of complaining, whining and being snarky with each other. I believe you can do it! It’s never too late to start. Make a family pact and stick to it. Eat without conflict, talk about the highs and lows of one’s day, feast in peace!
Prayer
Dad,
I am so very thankful for the chance to not only live different from my childhood, but also to give our family, our children much more than tension and trauma around the table. Even through my many failures as a Dad, you were still able to give us a peace that allows us to regularly get together even as adults. The laughter and joy is palpable, giving us hope that our grandgirls will experience the same for their future families.